Rise and Come

 

This was written September 17, 2005, about 6 weeks before my brother died.

Dear God:

The fear that plays around the edges of my heart is that this enjoyment of scripture, this new way of studying Your word will fade away (reading for the pause, writing to You, God and being quiet as I wait to hear what You might way and then writing it down.) And I’ll get stuck just reading for information/content again.

What if it’s just a nice idea that doesn’t last long? I’ve read the first 4 chapters of John and have never gotten so much from reading your Word…What if I read sometime and nothing speaks to me? Lord, I have been here before – but it didn’t last. What is different this time?

I talk to Shirley about it and she sends me the following note by mail:

“And so, after she has risen, the Word again says “Rise” and after she has come, He says “Come.” One who has thus risen never lacks the opportunity to rise further and the one who is running towards the Lord, never reaches the end of the space available for the divine race. We should always be rising and those whom the race is bringing close the goal should never stop. Each time the word says “Rise and come,” He gives the power to ascend to still loftier heights. (St. Gregory)Carol, sit with these words awhile and see what they offer you. Love Shirley

Note:  as I look back over these past 6 years, I realize that being in community was important.  I thank God I had people walking the journey with me. 

I did “sit with it” and I wrote the following in my journal:

“never reaches the end of the space
available for the divine race…”

Lord, I love these words . . .
Thank for for drawing them to me today.

The thought gives me hope.
I cannot reach the end
of what you have for me!

Perhaps there will be times when I seek you
and I wont’ be able to see through the fog.
Maybe life will make it hard
to see and feel you.

But Lord, still I will “run to you . . .
Where else can I go?
Capture me with grace.
I will follow you” **

**from the song “Rescue” which we learned and sang in choir this month.

” Rescue”
by Jared Anderson

You are the source of life
I can’t be left behind
No one else will do
I will take hold of You

I need You Jesus, I need You Jesus

My heart is Yours for life
I need Your hand in mine
No one else will do
Lord I put my trust in You

chorus
I need You Jesus to come to my rescue
Where else can I go?
There’s no other Name by which I am saved
Capture me with grace
I will follow You
My heart is Yours for life
I need Your hand in mine
No one else will do
Lord I put my trust in You

bridge
This world has nothing for me (I will follow You)