Ten things I Learned on the Blessing Journey
(in no particular order) part 1
It’s been two years since mom died. Earlier in the spring of 2009, when I was feeling alone and inundated with the details and uncertainly of caring for my parents, I read an article in a Magazinethat gave me hope. One of the suggestions had to do with making sure I had village to help me. It was a timely article and worth the read: Click HERE
Here are the Ten Things:
1. Caring for an elderly parent takes a “village.”Know who they are and call on them.
2. I can’t predict how I’ll react. I have to accept what I feel, stay self-aware and reach out to my inner circle for support.
3. Losing someone by degrees is different from losing someone suddenly. I was afraid it would be the same.
4. Knowing how I receive comfort is important. Asking for it is even more important.
5. Letting people help me, even inconvenience themselves for me, is good. I can’t make the choice as to when someone else is too busy or unable to help. I learned to trust them to respond according to their availability.
6. When I let others help me or the one I love, it blesses them as much as it blesses me.
7. It’s important to let others do the things I can’t do, so I can do what only I can do.
8. I need to accept that even though this doesn’t fit into the plan I had for this time of my life, it IS the plan GOD has for me now. And perhaps sharing my journey can help others.
9. Make sure conversations are about what is really on my heart, so that I don’t get sidetracked, and focus on external circumstances.
10. Death is not pleasant – we were created for life, not death. When it happens, however it happens, God is Good and He is Present.
A Bonus Lesson: The Grandchildren comforted me. I recommend you find a child if you don’t have some and hug them. Better yet, let them hug you.
Many of you have been and are there – what have you learned? I am sure there is more!
Click HERE for Part 2a of the Blessing Journey
Thank you!
I love this list. I want to give it to a friend who does not want to ask anyone to help her when she has to have surgery. I wish I could be there for her but she is too far away.
please add me to your blog list.
Good thoughts altho I am saddened that the church cannot minister like this but secular icons like Oprah can speak more poignantly to certain issues than our own fellowship. I have experienced this…just noting. Loved the pictures of your parents…that is how I remember them. Love from a fellow traveler. Carolyn
Sometimes it was easy to “fight” with Galen over some detail which may or may not have been important, when in reality i was scared to death about what was happening and so afraid i would not be able to do what needed to be done. Or getting mad at mom when she was not being reasonable, probably because she was just as scared as me. it’s easier to focus on stuff when sometimes we needed to talk about feelings.
Could you explain number nine? They were all so helpful- I want to know what that one meant!
Thank you for sharing. The pictures are am sweet tribute to what a loving mom and Grandmommy she was. Of course, she raised you, which means she was pretty special. 😉