Trust: Peace when I cannot see.

LAKE Opeka

LORD: 
On this misty, rainy morning I sit here at the lake
under the pavilion, 
pondering what it means to really trust You.  
It's been on my mind a lot lately. .  
So many changes
Things happening I never expected,
Things I couldn't control. 
Life feeling like it's upside down. 

Such a mystery - this thing called trust
and the peace I am supposed to feel 
when I trust you.

Sometimes I feel "peace," but
feeling good when 
I see a way
through  
seems more like trusting 
my resourcefulness 
than trusting
You.

I suspect true peace is more like 
when I can't see
knowing You are in the chaos
knowing it might not "turn out all right"
at least according to me.

It's the knowing
You are patient with me 
as I work toward a place
of trust.

This morning,as I sit here, 
the breeze blows from the North
bringing with it the fragrance 
from an early summer flowering tree.      

IMG_2929Going over to take a close-up picture,
the scent grows stronger
as I walk through the wet grass
and the misty rain.

I see the cream-colored flowers
against the dark green foliage. 
IMG_2934

I touch the delicate petals. 
IMG_2932
My senses are overwhelmed
and soon it's all I am thinking about . . .
cream-colored, 
dark-green fragrant 
beauty.  

And I hear You say, 
Stay close to me,	
Let me overwhelm your senses.
Stay away from the fray.
Stop trying to figure it out. 
Your peace does not depend on "good news,"
things going the way you want
or think you need them to go.    

Yes, Lord.  
I'll need your help.
It's hard to live "in between"
the problem
and Your solution.     

I guess that's the whole point, isn't it God?
Trust when I can see
probably isn't trust at all.

11 Replies to “Trust: Peace when I cannot see.”

  1. Carol. I understand this through and through. Worries and troubles need to be totally surrendered. Peace comes through complete reliance on Christ. I finally realized that my desire for control was really lack of trust. A great Christian counselor and a book by Renee Swope has helped me realize this in the last few months. I am trusting that God will lead me on the right path this fall.
    See you soon.
    Julie Uher

  2. Thanks for this. I am Charles and Syble Cook’s daughter. We have stepped out by faith to be missionaries to the US (still on deputation) and are now dealing with my 3 year old having bad seizures. I don’t know how it’s all going to work out and I’m just learning to trust. It’s easy to talk about trusting God until you have to live it to the extreme! I enjoyed this post.

  3. SO wonderfully said, Carol! Your writings are a sweet confirmation to the trust I am living in. PTL that He alone is in control!

  4. Elaine – thanks for your comment – I am glad they spoke to you. The original journaling was done June 15 – still simmering in my heart and mind!

  5. I find learning to trust is a decision. It’s something we practice and as we frequent it more, it’s easier.We experience less stress and more of the joy God intended for us!

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